I’ve been feeling a bit sorry for myself over the last few days. Lots of reasons – worrying about the future, wondering how long I can manage working full time, resenting how much time I spend planning how to preserve spoons (see previous post on “spoon theory”), noticing worsening symptoms and also dealing with feeling cold most of the time.
According to the MS Trust, between 60 and 80% of those with MS struggle with heat sensitivity …I don’t think I fall into this group. This is what they say about cold sensitivity…
“Cold sensitivity is less common with MS than heat sensitivity, and it tends to affect different symptoms. The symptoms most likely to be affected are nerve pain, mobility and spasms. Depression and fatigue may also be triggered by the cold, particularly if it coincides with poor weather and less sunlight.”
I think that sums it up nicely! I always struggle mentally with winter and this year is no exception. In addition to this, my thyroid levels are all wrong at the moment, so feeling cold is something I’m stuck with for now. As well as MS, I have Hashimoto’s Disease (autoimmune thyroid disease) and am currently working with my GP to get my meds at the right level – unfortunately we’re not there yet!
Yesterday, whilst scrolling through Facebook, this photo of me from exactly a year ago popped up …
A year ago I could go to a gig and dance all night, I didn’t need a walking stick or a Blue Badge and although I was experiencing episodes of fatigue, I didn’t have to give too much thought to how many spoons I had left to get through the day. I am haunted by the feeling that I’m slowly fading away.
Today I met with my lovely friend, Beth for a coffee and a chinwag (therapy really!) and when I got in the car to travel there, one of my favourite songs came on the radio …
This song has a lot of meaning for me – it tells me I can get through things if I just keep going. So, I can get through this bit of a blip too. Thank you Stone Roses and XS Manchester.
Later, I had a visit from my son and his dog and we went for a walk in my local park …lovely.
So, today has reminded me that the best things in life are all around us …we just need to make sure we value and appreciate them. Here’s my list from today:
- Music 🎼
- Friends 👭
- Coffee ☕️
- Cake 🍰
- Family 👩👧👦
- Pets 🐶😺
- Fresh air 🥾
- Sunshine ☀️
- Trees 🌳
- Water 💦
❤️