140 Big Decision – HSCT is no longer for me

On 16th March 2020, I should have been flying to Moscow for a month long hospital stay to receive HSCT, in the hope that this would halt the progression of my multiple sclerosis.  During March 2020, the whole world gradually went into lockdown due to COVID 19 and on the Thursday before I was due to depart, my flights and treatment were cancelled. 

Before this, I’d spent the previous two years preparing for my trip … fundraising, making arrangements for post HSCT care, arranging time off work, preparing to make my home as germ free as possible, losing weight, eating well and mentally preparing for my treatment and recovery.  I felt positive, determined, relatively healthy and as ready as I could be.  HSCT was the main focus of my life.  

It was devastating for everything to be cancelled at the last minute and I must admit, the weeks and months after that were a struggle. At the time, like everyone, I believed the new situation would last for just a few weeks or months, at the most, and I was determined to get my treatment plan back on track as soon as possible. 

As time went on, I began to realise that this new situation was going to last much longer than we all expected.  I also began to worry about having a treatment that virtually eliminates the immune system, during a worldwide viral pandemic.  Once travel became possible again, the clinic in Russia reopened and was soon treating patients from all over the world as before. 

On 24th February 2022, Russian forces invaded neighbouring Ukraine and there has been ongoing military action there since, with many of Ukrainian people brutally killed and many thousands more displaced, losing their homes and the lives they once knew.  The rest of the world initiated sanctions on Russia (and Belarus), including restricting financial transactions and travel.  The clinic in Russia has continued to treat patients, with most travelling via Turkey and paying by use of complex international banking arrangements.  I have no reason to distrust anyone working at the hospital, but would not feel it ethically acceptable for me to pay money into the Russian economy, or to travel there at the moment.  By this I mean, I don’t have any criticism of those who are still seeking treatment in Russia, but I don’t believe it would be right for me. 

There are two hospitals in Mexico, with an excellent reputation for providing HSCT for international patients and these would certainly be an option for me if I wanted to proceed; the biggest draw backs being higher cost and further distance to travel.

There is much discussion in the world of HSCT about which patients are the best candidates for successful outcomes.  It seems that some of the key factors are age; time since disease onset; disease type; presence/absence of current inflammation in the brain and/or spinal cord and EDSS (this is not an exhaustive list).  Some of those for whom treatment isn’t successful, actually become more unwell following HSCT and there is a connection between these risk factors and mortality rates too. 

From 7 things you need to know about HSCT | Multiple Sclerosis Society UK

Age … HSCT seems to be most effective in people who are treated when younger. There are people who have received HSCT well into their 60s or 70s, but evidence seems to show that those in their 20s, 30s and 40s people are more likely to have successful outcomes. The upper age limit for the STAR-MS trial ongoing in the UK is 55. my current age is 57.

Time Since Disease Onset … Evidence shows that HSCT is most effective for those in the early stages of the disease, with 10 years often quoted as the upper limit.  Calculating the length of time since disease onset is much more difficult than it would appear.  I was diagnosed in 2017, but my first known symptoms were in 2011.  I had various health problems and unusual symptoms for a number of years before this and it’s possible that multiple sclerosis was the culprit. 

Disease Type … I was initially diagnosed with RRMS (Relapsing Remitting Multiple Sclerosis) and this is known to be the “type” of MS that is most likely to respond well to HSCT.  This presents as periods of disease activity with periods of remission, during which symptoms may subside or even disappear.  Over time, many of those with RRMS transition to SPMS (Secondary Progressive Multiple Sclerosis) where there is a slow general increase in symptoms with no periods of remission and no recovery from symptoms.  It is difficult to pinpoint the time of transition from RRMS to SPMS and the diagnosis is usually made retrospectively.  My neurologist believes I am now secondary progressive with superimposed relapses, although these are becoming less frequent.  I take this to mean that I am transitioning to SPMS. 

Presence/Absence of Inflammation in the Brain and/or Spinal Cord … HSCT is thought to work by reducing inflammation in the central nervous system and acting on the process that would cause future inflammation.  In SPMS, it is less likely for there to be ongoing inflammation, with symptoms caused by previously incurred damage to the brain and spinal cord and the body’s reduced ability to compensate for this as we get older.  My last MRI (July 2021) showed no ongoing inflammation and no new lesions.

EDSS … Disability in MS is measured using the EDSS (Expanded Disability Status Scale) and although there is much criticism and discussion about the appropriateness of this system, it is still used by hospitals providing HSCT.  For the clinic in Russia, the upper EDSS limit is 6, although the hospital in Mexico will consider those with a higher EDSS.  Two years ago, my EDSS was 6, however, I think there is a possibility that it is now 6.5.  Those with a lower EDSS are more mobile, are likely to be more active and generally in better health, making treatment and recovery a little easier. 


I’ve been thinking about all of the above over the last months, had discussions with various friends and family members and have reached the difficult conclusion that HSCT is no longer for me.  It has been a tough decision to make and I wanted to give myself time and to feel sure that it is the right one for me.  I still believe that HSCT is an amazing, life changing, treatment for many and there is much hope for MS patients in the future.  Basically, I feel timing is all wrong for me and I no longer feel it is my best option.  

This decision leads me to thinking about how to manage the funds that were raised and that so many friends, family and strangers contributed to. The source of these funds falls into 4 main categories and I am proposing dealing with them as follows:

  • Donations from individuals … give donors the choice of where this money goes (return, AIMS or other medical expenses).
  • Money raised via events and sponsored activities … use for other medical expenses.
  • Money raised selling jewellery and other items previously owned by my mum … use to fund a family get together (this is what we originally planned for this money but my family kindly donated it to my fund).
  • My own savings … return to my own bank account. 

If you have contributed in any way to these funds, please do let me know if you have a view on this.  Thank you to the various friends and family who have already given me a chance to talk this through with them. Whatever is decided, full details will be published here and on the GoFundMe page.

I have mentioned other medical expenses above and I thought I’d explain a little about what I mean by that. 

At the moment, I pay for CBD and for one of my thyroid medications that is not available on the NHS.  I hope to try LDN and Ampyra in the future; both are only available by private prescription in England.  Being chronically ill is very expensive!

My chariot

In November, I purchased my rollator (henceforth known as my “chariot”) as such equipment is not provided by the NHS.  I bought a relatively cheap one, as I was unsure of how useful it would be to me.  In fact, it has proved to be very useful and has kept me walking at times that would have been beyond me with just a walking stick or trecking poles.  Now that I’ve  had some experience, I realise that the specifications of my chariot are not ideal for me and I will need to buy a more suitable one in the future.  

I am also now thinking about a mobility scooter and these are very expensive.  I realise that it is really important to me to retain as much independence as possible and to be able to go out and about and do as I please. A mobility scooter may help provide this.  

In addition I find myself considering private neurology, physio therapy and orthotics assessments in order to get the best possible advice on how to manage my MS and symptoms.  Currently I have a 10 minute appointment with my neurologist once a year and I have been on waiting lists for physiotherapy and orthotics since April 2020.  My MS Nurse has retired and despite making numerous phone calls, I am still awaiting an appointment with her replacement.  My mobility has deteriorated markedly since 2020 and I’m becoming worried that I will soon be beyond any activity or devices that could help me to make the most of life.

In redistributing the funds we have raised, I want to ensure I am completely open and transparent about where the money goes and what it is used for.  I’d like to help others who may benefit from HSCT and I’d like to try all I can to stay as well as possible for as long as I can, even if HSCT is no longer the route towards that for me. 

I want to make it clear that I have made this decision for me (with help from family and friends) and I know it is the right decision.  I am not a neurologist or expert in MS, just a person doing their best to manage their disease.  If you have MS, I don’t want my decision to influence any decision you make for yourself.  I also point out that the points listed above, that influenced my decision, are just my interpretation of my situation, following much reading and research over the last few years.  I know the situation is not simple and that I will have got things wrong.  Please do your own reading and research before making a decision for yourself.  I have added some useful links below, as a starting point.

I hope no one is disappointed that I have made this decision, particularly those who have supported me and given your time and money towards helping me.  I will be forever grateful for all the love and support I have received since I began considering HSCT.

You are all amazing 💙💚

If you have made it to the end of this post, thank you and well done! (I know its rather long and not that interesting!).

Links

AIMS https://www.aimscharity.org/

UK HSCT Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/groups/ukhsct/?ref=sharehttps://www.facebook.com/groups/ukhsct/?ref=share&exp=7ffb

HSCT in Russia https://hsct-russia.com/

HSCT Mexico http://hsctmexico.com/ms_landing.php?gclid=CjwKCAjwzeqVBhAoEiwAOrEmzX2kJsjxXJBz_WCaB7XlZvP_jTFRg2cR3ckB9b1LS5viDFw47V8ZtBoCXMQQAvD_BwE

EDSS https://mstrust.org.uk/a-z/expanded-disability-status-scale-edss

GoFundMe https://www.gofundme.com/f/another-ms-warrior

CBD (Please search CBD Brothers)

LDN https://ldnresearchtrust.org/what-is-low-dose-naltrexone-ldn

Ampyra/Fampridine https://mstrust.org.uk/a-z/fampridine-fampyra

118 Progress update

With just 5 and a half weeks until my trip to Russia, my travel plans are coming along nicely. My flights are booked and all necessary paperwork has been sent to the hospital ahead of my treatment.  My transfers between the airport and hospital are booked and family are ready to transport me both ways at this end. The hospital is processing my visa invitation and I am hoping to receive this very soon.  

I have started buying bits and pieces I will need whilst in hospital and when I get home and it really feels as if things are coming together at last.  When we get a bit nearer to my departure, I will post my packing list, in case it’s of use to any fellow MS Warriors in the future.

When I get home after my treatment, my immune system will still be very low and it will be necessary for me to take precautions to avoid infection.  I will be asking friends and family to stay away if they are unwell and will be avoiding certain foods such as soft boiled eggs, blue cheese and sushi.   I will also be keeping the house scrupulously clean.  Niamh and Sophie have volunteered to do a “deep clean” shortly before I come home and we will need to be obsessive about wiping surfaces, light switches, handrails etc to lower the infection risk.  We will use anti bacterial hand gel regularly throughout the day and most importantly of all, I’m going to try really hard to keep my hands away from my face (the number one way in which we catch infections). 

Arrangements are in hand for my blood levels to be monitored by my GP on my return (with support from Haematology if needed).  My GP will also be providing “fit notes”, which Niamh will collect and pass on to my employer while I’m away. 

Something I Have had to give a lot of thought to, is how to avoid any risks from my two cats, Ziggy and Luna.

Thankfully neither of them are biters/scratchers and it’s fine for me to touch and interact with them, provided I wash my hands afterwards.  We have already ensured that their immunisations are up to date and I will make sure to avoid cat litter duties for the first few weeks.  The biggest cat problem I envisage is keeping them off my bed and out of my bedroom 😼

I love having plants and flowers in the house but both soil and flower water are potential sources of bacteria and fungal spores.  I am going to send all my houseplants to Connor and Sophie’s house for a while and will be politely requesting visitors don’t bring flowers.  

—- 🌷🌷🌷 —-

As you are aware, we have been fundraising to pay for my treatment for some time now.  The cost of treatment is 45,000 Euros and with the value of the pound so unsteady at the moment, I find myself anxiously watching the financial markets to see where it is up to.  There was a big dip earlier this week, which sent me into a bit of a panic!  I’ll be so glad when I’ve made the payment and can stop worrying about this so much!

Our GoFundMe appeal has raised £21,181 so far … thank you to each and every one of you. We have a few fundraisers in the pipeline and will continue after my treatment, until borrowed funds are replayed. If anyone has any fundraising ideas or would like to do a sponsored event, please get in touch with one of us.

At this point, any and all donations will be gratefully received via the GoFundMe page linked below.  

GoFundMe

Thank you for all your amazing support over the last 18 months …I can’t believe we’re almost there at last! 😘

109 A quick update

This is just a quick post to touch base and to update you on a couple of things.  

I was going to write a post entitled “A day in the life of an MSer” but as I started writing it, I began to realise it was too bloomin miserable for public consumption! 

I’ve had a difficult couple of weeks, overwhelmed with MS symptoms and generally feeling rubbish. I didn’t manage to go to work at all last week but I’m hoping to get back to it on Monday. I think I’ll delay my “day in the life” post until I’m feeling more positive! 

~~~ 🌟 ~~~

I don’t live in the same place that I grew up and I have friends and family all over the place.  I keep in touch with many by email, whatsapp, Facebook, Messenger etc and really love to hear from people.  Over the last few weeks, I’ve had lots of lovely messages from friends and family, many of which I haven’t managed reply to.  I’m sorry for being so rubbish at this.  I really do appreciate hearing from you, I’m not ignoring you, I haven’t forgotten you …I’m just struggling to deal with everything at the moment.

Something else I’m in danger of falling behind on is this blog, so this post is an attempt to address that. 

~~~ 🌟 ~~~

In amongst the stressful last few weeks, I received some really good news …a letter from Professor Sharrack at Sheffield Hallamshire Hospital.  I have an appointment with him in February and he is hoping to bring this forward.  He has also asked me to bring a copy of my previous MRI scans (on a CD) so that he compare it with the scan I had in June.  It’s hard to say whether this is a hopeful step or not (I’m trying not to get my hopes up), but at least I’ll have a final answer on HSCT in the UK a little sooner previously thought.

In the meantime, we are still fundraising and aiming for my date in Russia in March. Our fundraising total now lies at …

It would be amazing to get to £20K before Christmas 🎄🎁🎅🏻

~~~ 🌟 ~~~

We are asking people to think about the Christmas cards they send and consider whether there is a different way to approach this …

Are you about to hurry out to buy Christmas cards that will eventually end up in the bin? Why not help us instead…

This year, instead of buying Christmas cards or receiving a Secret Santa present, please consider donating the money you would usually spend to our fundraiser?

Not only would this help us to get a little bit closer to our target, but it would also help to save our planet and hopefully relieve some Christmas stress!

It is estimated that around 900 million Christmas cards are sent each year in the UK. When you factor in postage costs, that’s a lot of money on something that will be forgotten about in just a few weeks time.   Why not send an e-card, text, WhatsApp or Facebook message to wish your loved ones a happy Christmas …real life hugs and good wishes are even better! ❤️

Thank you so much for anything you are able to donate.  Please share this idea with your family and friends and anyone you know who would like to find a way to help others at Christmas time 🎅🎄❤️

~~~ 🌟 ~~~


Our next fundraising event is the Vintage Village Merry Little Christmas Fair on Sunday 8th December from 10am till 4pm.  Thank you for all your kind donations of items to sell 😘

Please come along and join us if you can …I’ve heard there will be mulled wine! 🍷

GoFundMe

108 Fundraising update

After a busy week I have finally found some time to update you on the total raised at last week’s Vintage fair …

We are absolutely delighted with this total and had a fun day at the fair as well ❤️
You may recall from my previous post that a very kind lady on a neighbouring stall gave us some advice on some of the jewellery items we were selling … this turned out to be excellent advice.  These items are now being sold through a jeweller and have raised around £230.  Thank you so much Ann, for your expert knowledge and kind advice ❤️

We will be back at the next Vintage Village fair, hoping to sell the rest of our items.  Please come along if you can ❤️

——– ❤️ ———

I had my PIP assessment on Monday.  On the surface, it wasn’t a bad experience, but I don’t feel much happened during the assessment to truly assess my limitations or to support my claim.

For those that don’t know, “Personal Independence Payment (PIP) can help you with some of the extra costs if you have a long term ill-health or disability”.

Personal Independence Payment (PIP)

Numerous charities and organisations that support those with medical conditions and disability are critical of the government’s approach to the assessment process for PIP and other disability benefits.  The MS Society is currently campaigning on behalf of those with MS who need this payment and is reporting on some of the difficulties MSers face with the process. 

PIP doesn’t make sense

“The assessor rushed through the questions and didn’t give me a chance to explain anything properly” …this was entirely my experience too. She stopped me going into detail about my difficulties and there were several times when I mentioned a particular issue but she didn’t even write it down. 

It makes me really angry. You have a diagnosis of MS and there are clinical records that back that up. And then you get a report that completely contradicts it. It doesn’t make sense.

You don’t want to prove you have MS, but you have to prove how badly it affects you. To have someone judging you for a chronic illness is terrible.”

So, I’m not holding out a lot of hope that I will be successful.  I’ve had to reduce my working hours because of my illness and struggling financially as a result.  Life with a disability is expensive and stressful.  I will definitely appeal if I am turned down and have some kind offers of support with this from friends with expert knowledge.

You can sign the MS Society open letter to the next UK government on this subject here … link 

——– ❤️ ———

Other than the vintage fair, we don’t have any further fundraising events until after Christmas.  

I haven’t sent Christmas cards for several years now after I started to become concerned about the huge amount of waste they generate and amount of money they cost, which I’d rather spend elsewhere.  Instead I donate the money I save to charity (Children in Need, the NSPCC, the RSPCA, Myeloma UK and the MS Trust have all been recipients in the past).

This year, I’ll be paying into my HSCT fund. 

There is a growing trend to stop sending Christmas cards and it is thought that many more people will be choosing this option this year.  An unbelievable 1.5 billion Christmas cards are thrown away by UK households each year, (according to researchers at Imperial College) and it would be amazing if we could reduce this figure. 

If you do decide to stop sending a Christmas cards and donate to a worthy cause instead, I do hope you’ll think of us.  Even small donations can make a big difference and I would be very grateful for whatever you can spare ❤️

GoFundMe

Thank you for your continued support ❤️💚❤️

99 The story so far …

Today, 16th September 2019, is exactly one year since we launched our fundraising campaign, asking family, friends and strangers to help raise a massive £40K to fund HSCT for me in Moscow.  I know I have many new readers since then, so thought now was a good time to write a bit of a summary of the story so far and also to reflect on how far we have come.  

I was diagnosed with Relapsing Remitting Multiple Sclerosis in 2017, after at least 5 years of worrying symptoms and concerning finds on MRI scans.  I also have Hashimoto’s Disease, autoimmune thyroid disease, which was diagnosed in 2006. 

The progression and accumulation of disability of my MS has been rapid.  At the time of diagnosis, my EDSS score was around 1.5 and by December 2018, my neurologist assessed me as 6 (I think I am nearer 5 or 5.5).  I have other long term problems and don’t want to get any worse.  

In May 2018, I saw a BBC news report about HSCT (Haematopoietic Stem Cell Transplant) being successfully used to treat MS and halt its progression (HSCT does not cure MS or undo previous damage to the brain and spinal cord).  Since then, I have been reading, researching and talking to others in order to learn everything I can about HSCT and find out whether could be a viable option for me.  

Click here …

Stem cell transplant “game changer” for MS patients – BBC News 18.03.18

By the Summer of 2018, I had come to the conclusion that it could and began looking seriously at how to access the treatment.  I was aware that some MS patients have been successfully treated in the UK, but that the criteria for inclusion were very specific.  I also knew that I did not meet the criteria, so began researching options abroad.

To cut a long story short, I identified a clinic in Moscow, the AA Maximov Department of Hematology and Cellular Therapy, as my best option.  Well over 1000 international MS patients have been treated here, with several hundred from the UK. 

The cost is €45,000 and with the exchange rate at that time and the additional cost of flights and visas, we worked out that we would need £40K to get me to Moscow for the treatment I need.

We launched our Go Fund Me page on 16th September 2018 and began organising events and taking part in challenges to raise money.  Thanks to the generosity of friends, family and kind strangers, we have raised ….

In the mean time, I also applied to the clinic in Moscow, sent them my full medical records and was accepted for treatment.  We had hoped that I could have HSCT in April 2018, with a plan to borrow the rest of the money needed and to continue to fund raise afterwards.  Then, a couple of months before this, I heard about a new HSCT trial planned to take place in the UK, being led by Professor Sharrack (neurologist) Professor Snowden (haematologist) and at Sheffield Hallamshire Hospital.  This is the team mentioned in the BBC link above. I contacted both directly and despite not meeting their published criteria, they agreed to see me.

I had my first appointment with them in June, followed by an MRI scan in July.  I was told I’d have a follow up appointment in August, but I’m still waiting.  They tell me I will be allocated an appointment on Monday (16th September) and will receive a letter soon after.  

The last few weeks have been very difficult for me.  I’m not good at being patient or at not knowing what’s coming next.  I also feel that all other aspects of my life are in limbo …I can’t plan anything!  I must admit this has really got me down.

Hopefully by the end of this week, I’ll have an appointment date and feel a bit calmer about it all!   I think once I have a date, I will be able to throw myself into other things until the date approaches.  

The decision on whether to treat me in Sheffield or not, all hinges on the outcome of my recent MRI scan …if there is current disease activity, then the answer could be YES.  If there is no current disease activity, then the answer will definitely be NO.  My last 3 scans (most recent in May 2018) all revealed current disease activity, which was upsetting and worrying at the time.  Now I’m in the strange position to be hoping for disease activity! 

I am still in touch with the clinic in Moscow and they are aware of my situation.  If I receive a NO from Sheffield, I will ask for the next available date in Moscow (likely to be early 2020).

Here’s a summary in numbers, of all we have achieved …

  • Funds raised … £18,646
  • Number of donors … 147
  • Go Fund Me followers …145
  • Blog posts … 99
  • Blog subscribers … 22
  • Blog views … 5,283
  • Facebook followers … 107
  • Instagram followers … 208
  • Twitter followers … 262

Never in my wildest dreams did I think we could achieve this much, so thank you to everyone who has donated, helped with events, provided support, shared online and who have been there for me through this journey so far.

Hopefully I’ll have an appointment update by this time next week!

GoFundMe

Facebook

Instagram @anothermswarrior

Twitter @AnotherMSWarrio

58 Fundraising update

Well, today has been a wonderful day in terms of fundraising for my treatment. 

Late last night, I spotted a post in one of the HSCT support groups from someone who had HSCT earlier this year, is making an excellent recovery, has some spare cash and wants to use it to help others.  As you can imagine, he had many replies (there are literally hundreds of people from all over the world, trying to raise funds for HSCT).  I added my fundraiser to the responses, thinking if I was lucky, I might receive a couple of quid from this unexpected source.  

I was very pleasantly surprised this morning when I found that this kind person and his wife have donated $225 (£179) into my account.  If he has paid this amount into the accounts of everyone who has responded, I reckon he will have paid out almost $10,000.   What a heart warming and generous thing to do ❤️

I logged in to my fundraising page to thank the kind stranger for his donation and found I had received a message from someone I haven’t seen for many years – a school friend of my brother!  He is running a half marathon in early January and is raising funds for my campaign! What an amazing thing to do! Thank you so much George. 

Later at work I discovered that my manager, rather than buy all the team a small gift for Christmas, has made a donation instead. My lovely work team were in full agreement and I must admit, I had a tear in my eye when I found out ❤️

And to complete this amazing day, I came home to a letter from the tax man informing me that they are giving me a rebate of £63 …not a huge amount I know, but I usually only hear from them when the error is in the other direction! 

I’ve been feeling a bit overwhelmed recently, at the enormity of the task ahead, but today has given me such a boost and I am feeling optimistic again! 

GoFundMe

We have plenty of other fundraising events coming up …

  • Our evening event is almost confirmed …date to follow.
  • Cal’s head (and chin) shave will take place soon.
  • My mum’s coin and stamp collection is going to the sale room in January.
  • Niamh and Sophie are working on an open water swimming challenge for early Summer.
  • Discussions are ongoing for a sponsored tandem skydive.
  • Glenda is taking part in a sponsored Nordic Walk.
  • Fiona and Kyra are taking part in sponsored running events. 
  • Anna and Zeb have a stall at their school Christmas fair.